what i mean by what i do..

was really agitated the whole day...firstly i got hacked real bad...secondly i couldnt play all the songs that would normally make me feel better...nevertheless seeing 'her' really calmed me down like 10 notches...something even kian's whole box of chocolates couldn't do...

when i make fun of you its coz i care, and you mean something to me...i can be bothered to come up with "wheelchair club" jokes if i wasnt close to you and no matter what happens i always have my friends back..and definitely have yours as well...

"whats wrong with me...?"...i ask myself this question very so often and well if i have a friend who missed a scoring opportunity, the normal thing to do is go and encourage him to to get up and try again...but isnt there another way of doing that? like "wats wrong with u bro...?" it would encourage him in a whole new way...of coz u cant say that to someone you hardly know...words like that can only be used on someone you are close to...and it doesnt really matter if your friend is a guy or a girl...thats what i believe...but i might have been wrong all this while...might have hurt alot of people in the process...the thing is i did put myself in her shoes and yet i see it as something normal...which brings me to another thing i learned, painfully...nobody is the same...if you have 100 friends none of them will react exactly the same way to a particular situation...all of them have totally different ways to react....almost similar , well some might argue but seriously i have seen enough to know almost similar is still not similar...

For everything i have out you through...i am sorry~just hope you understand that i will never do or say anything to hurt you or make you feel less comfortable about who you are...

i know what i did was wrong for thinking of even the slightest possibility of the existance of 2 people who think the same way...that has to change...nevertheless there are some things we guys are often mistaken for or taken for granted..

1)we are just as soft as you...so what hurts you naturally hurts us as well
however,

2)we are not as strong as you are, coz we have this thing called pride which makes us wanna deal with things alone, most of the time taking wrong solutions or long winded paths.

3)we might be wrong about certain things but please, we cant be wrong about everything...

4)when we say we are sorry we mean it but i dunno why very so often this is mistaken as something like a routine...i know many ppl out there who find it hard to even say sorry when they are in the wrong, but there are some of us who are willing to accept the mistake bcoz even if we do not understand it then, one day, when we actually sit down and think we will...

5)lastly, nobody's perfect...all my life i have been judged by people for things i am not..it gets my blood boiling but well i have learned my lesson to not let my temper get the better of things...so yeah judged or not judged i am being recognised as a person i am not...i wouldnt want anyone to change that...as this is one thing that separates my brothers and sisters from my friends.

sometimes i take things for granted, sometimes i say or do things i do not understand but if there is one person that has actually made me think and reflect so much about myself, it would be YOU, so please dont judge me just yet. what i said the other day, i meant every word of it.

love the little things you do...
want you to keep doing it
for all its worth
i wana be 'the one' for you
take care of you,
listen to you,
laugh at your jokes,
hold you in my arms,
wipe away your tears,
making sure they never come again,
be there in every circumstance,
even if its just to watch you smile for a second
i would give it my all...